 My new tango shoes! |
Twelve years ago, when I first started dancing Argentine Tango, I didn´t know then how useful and powerful it would be in my business and career — and indeed, my life.
I can talk about this topic at length. But I won´t! |
Instead, let me tell you about ONE very important thing I learned from dancing Tango. And that is how to communicate effectively and authentically (which, I hope you´ll agree, is a critical skill in business networking).
Huh?
Well, consider this:
As a dancer, you must pay attention to multiple things simultaneously, and use these pieces of information to make instant decisions. Such as, the music and how you want to interpret it and dance to it. To the other dancers on the floor and what they´re doing, so you can avoid bumping into them. And so on.
In any kind of partner dancing, there is an added component. You must also simultaneously pay attention to your partner and his or her intentions — which, in dance, is sensory (not verbal or visual). So now you´re consciously using 3 of your 5 senses to pick up information.
And in Argentine Tango, there is yet another layer of complexity. This is an improvisational dance, in which the leader´s and the follower´s steps don´t mirror each other. This means, for instance, the follower MUST pay attention to the lead to know what to do. Space out for a second, and you´re lost!
These are same components necessary for having a genuine and engaging conversation.
Think about it.
In any conversation, particularly in a business networking situation, you must pay attention to what the other person is saying, both verbally and otherwise.
You cannot, or rather should not, anticipate what he or she may say. You cannot space out. And you certainly should not start your own monologue.
In addition, you have to take into account the context of the conversation, the physical environment, any other people present or involved, and so on.
For me, every time I dance, it´s a way of practicing being attentive and connecting with another person.
So when I go dancing, I like to dance with different partners, including people with whom I´ve never danced before. It helps improve both my dancing and my conversations (though I don´t do both at the same time!).
OK, so what if you´re not into partner dancing?
What can you do to improve your conversation skills?
Well, what activity do you engage in that requires you to be attentive in this manner? Perhaps you play a sport, or a musical instrument.
Whatever it is, notice how you pay attention to all the little details and how you use these pieces of information in an instant to make decisions.
Then, do the same in your conversations.
If you´d like to explore this topic further, contact me.