Effortless Networking

What’s the best way to get someone interested in what you have to say?

By finding out what’s of interest to the other person.

(Yes, I know I’m stating the obvious! But you’d be amazed at how often the obvious is overlooked.)

Once you know what a person is interested in, you can frame what you have to say in a way that’s aligned with their interest.

Here is a video clip with Gary Halbert’s comments on this topic, courtesy of The System Seminar. Gary was one of the top copywriters of the last fifty years (he recently passed away).

Click here to watch the video.

In the business networking context, here are two important (and again, obvious) points to remember:

1. In order to find out what’s of interest to another person, you have to engage them in conversation first.

   In other words, you can’t start the conversation with your “pitch”.

2. If you can’t figure out how to frame what you have to say in a way that’s interesting to the other person, your topic is may not be one of interest to him or her.

   After all, not everyone is interested in everything.

Can it be that simple? Well, I think so.

Try it out and tell me what you think.

And as a follow-on to this topic, next week’s article will be on how to make sure that people WANT what you have to sell.

A recent comment from someone wanting “more specific information” reminded me of a similar comment I had made several years ago. It reminded me of the difference between competence and mastery:

My coach had given me a practice to build my network.

And I remember being really disappointed, and saying to her, “But I do all of this already! Can’t you give me something more advanced?”

And my coach said, “Sri, there’s a difference between competence and mastery.”

I stopped in my tracks.

I realized then that I was doing all the “right” things to build and cultivate my network. I was competent.

But I wasn’t a “master” at it, because I was just going through the motions. My actions lacked heart and soul.

When you listen to a “master” musician and a “competent” musician perform, you hear a difference.

What’s the difference? There’s emotion in one and not the other.

What’s my point?

If you’re a beginner (in business networking or anything else), specific and directed information is useful. Step-by-step “how-to” instructions help you get started.

You learn specific skills, and you become competent.

In order to master these skills, you use the same information.

The information doesn’t change; you do.

The difference is that instead of following specific instructions verbatim, you now begin to interpret the information and adapt it to your situation. You make it your own.

So what about you?

When it comes to networking and building relationships, are you striving for mastery? Or settling for competence?

In response to Michael’s comment last week, here’s a guest article from Ari Galper, founder of Unlock The Game.

You probably know this scenario well: Your main contact at a company has expressed interest in possibly purchasing your product or service.

You’ve had the pleasant conversations, you’ve heard “Yes, we’re definitely interested” and “Yes, I’m the decision maker,” and you’re excited about making the sale happen.

You’ve put your heart and soul into doing what you’re best at — explaining the benefits of your solution but working hard not to come across “salesy” or pushy.

As far as you’re concerned, you’ve done everything right.

Now you’re on the phone with your contact. You’re hoping this will be your last conversation before they fax the contract through.

Finally you ask, “So, is the agreement ready to be signed?” There’s a silence, and then you hear the disheartening words: “Oh, I realize that I should really have Mike and Julie, look at it before I send it over.”

Talk about being set up to believe everything was going to be smooth sailing — now a big wave has overturned the boat and it’s sinking fast! Why didn’t he tell you he wasn’t the final decision maker? Why did he lead you on?

Most important, what can you do to stop this from happening again?

Don’t despair! Here are seven ways to end the chasing game with decision makers:

1. Understand the psychology of working in an organization.

   No one in an organization wants to make a wrong decision and then be left holding the bag and looking bad. What’s more, in many cases even CEOs of companies can’t make final decisions without the other executives on their team buying in.

   So, even if your contact tells you that he or she is the only one making the decision, in most cases that’s highly unlikely, especially in larger organizations. Once you understand that, you’ll find it easier to roll with the news that others are actually involved in signing off on the decision.

2. Make sure your contact has the authority to sign the agreement without approval from others.

   How many times have you been told: “I’m the decision maker, and I decide if we’ll purchase your solution or not”? Contacts may say this with total confidence, and we usually take them at their word, only to discover later that they didn’t want us bypassing them to get to the other decision makers. Here’s how you can avoid this situation: After they tell you they are the decision maker, you simply say in a relaxed, easy-going conversational manner, “Oh, okay. No problem. So, basically you’re the only person who signs the agreement, and no one else needs to be involved with this decision?”

   It’s amazing what happens when you ask this question. First, there’s likely to be a short silence, and then all of a sudden you learn that other decision makers are involved. Once you know this, you can rethink your approach.

3. Don’t panic when you discover other decision makers are involved.
   
   Don’t get thrown off track when you suddenly learn, deep into the sales process, that other decision makers need to be involved in the decision. When this happens, gently suggest that it might make sense to come up with a way to get them involved with the proposal so they won’t be caught off guard.
4. Suggest a conference call to connect with the decision makers.

   Suppose you find out that two other decision makers are involved. Now you have a total of three! What can you do to avoid the delay that’s inevitable when your contact tells you, “I need to get hold of Mike and Julie, but they’re both traveling, so I’ll get back to you after I speak with them”? This situation is often the black hole of selling, because you can wait for weeks until your contact tracks down Mike and Julie and gets back to you.

   Here’s how to avoid this: You simply say, “Okay. No problem. Sounds as if Mike and Julie are an important part of the process…I’m wondering if it might make sense to pull together a brief conference call with you and them so that they can get an overview of what’s happening. That way you can avoid chasing them down, and everyone can get up to speed at the same time. Does that make sense?” Also, the answer you get will tell you a lot about where you really stand. If your contact says, “Sure. That makes sense. Let me schedule it,” things are looking good. But if you hear, “Nah, I’ll just try and get hold of them when I can and then get back to you,” he could be saying, “We aren’t really that interested.”

5. Work with your main contact to set the agenda for the conference call.

   If your contact agrees to the conference call, spend some time working together on a well-thought-out agenda. Emphasize that your main purpose is simply to inform the others about what has happened so far. It’s crucial that you assure your contact that during the call you will in no way apply any type of sales pressure on the other decision makers.

   Why is this important? Because many times contacts are reluctant to pull together a call because they’re afraid that the salesperson will put the participants on the spot, and that would make things awkward for everyone. When you begin the call, simply say, “The purpose of our call today is simply to bring you up to speed on what has happened so far so you all have the information you need to think this solution through at your own pace. Here at XYZ, we don’t believe in pressuring people to make decisions.” Your contact will love you for this.

6. Ask your contact to arrange the conference call.

   When you suggest a conference call with all the decision makers, it’s important to put your contact at ease. Too often, salespeople get anxious and say, “I’d be happy to contact the other folks and schedule the call for a time that works for all of us,” but that may make your contact think you’re going to try to influence the others before the call.

   To avoid accidentally triggering any “sales alarms,” simply ask your contact if he or she would be open to coordinating the call: “It might make sense if you could e-mail them to coordinate a time for all of us to connect, since you’re closer to them than I would be.”

7. Get to the truth about where the deal stands.

   So you have the conference call and you feel it went well, with lots of good discussion. Your intuition is telling you that everyone seemed positive about your solution. Now you want to find out the truth about where the deal stands, but you need to be careful not to call your contact and put subtle pressure on him or her to give you a final answer.

   You want to get that answer without asking outright, but you can’t until you’ve uncovered the truth about where everyone stands. When you call your contact back, don’t use the tired phrase, “I’m just calling to follow up.” That just kicks off sales pressure. Instead, say, “I’m just giving you a call to see what kinds of questions the others on the call might have, since those types of calls don’t always address everyone’s issues or concerns.” This will allow your contact to talk about where he or she stands, and you can then ask, “Where do you think we should go from here?”

These seven tips will help you put an end to the dreaded game of chasing decision makers.

To your success,
Ari

Ari Galper, founder of Unlock The Game, makes cold calling painless and simple. Learn his free cold calling secrets even the sales gurus don’t know. To receive your 10 free audio mini-lessons visit http://www.UnlockTheGame.com

“I do well with meeting new contacts. The conversation seems to flow very well, but when I call to follow-up, it seems their attitudes have changed and the interest level has diminished significantly.”

This brings back (bad) memories! This used to happen to me when I first started my business — and I can tell you, it was most demoralizing.

Well, fortunately, this doesn’s happen much anymore.

Here’s why:

1. I took a closer look at those disappointing situations and discovered some patterns.
2. I used the information revealed by these patterns to decide whom to follow up with, and whom to “let go”.

It turned out that most of the people who who’d lose interest when I called them later were in what I call the “trade show mode” when I initially talked to them.

This mode is when one says, “yes, I want whatever free thing you have”, without giving it much thought! This usually happens at trade shows (though not always) where there’s so much being offered, that many people get overwhelmed and say “yes” to everything.

Well, I found that these “trade show mode” folks were rarely ever interested when I followed up with them.

The other group of people were in “inspiration mode” during our initial conversation.

In other words, the speaker or something about the event where we’d met had inspired them to be interested in talking to me again.

However, by the time I followed up with them — even if it was the next day — the reality of getting back to work and the “daily grind” had dulled much of the initial inspiration and interest.

How did I solve this problem?

I started going for quality, not quantity.

I started paying closer attention during my initial conversation with people, to screen out the first group of people. And I probed the second group of people a little more about their interest in talking with me.

This means that I now spend my time and energy following up with only those who truly want to hear from me. And it makes all the difference in the world — for both of us.

So what can you do?

Look for patterns in your experience (your patterns may be different from mine). And decide how you’ll use the information to reduce your disappointments.

For more details, check out module 3 of the Effortless Networking self-study program.