How to connect with someone quickly
“How do I connect with someone quickly?”
This may seem like a simple question, but it’s actually a little more complex — and perhaps you know that already. When I work privately with clients on such a topic, it takes a few months!
Still, here are two steps you can take right away, to connect quickly with someone, no matter what the situation.
- What are you listening for?
- Listen for it!
In other words, how will you know when you’ve “connected” with someone?
For instance, will you recognize the “connection” when you hear the other person say something in particular? Or when he or she has a certain facial expression? Or when you feel a particular way physically (i.e. gut feeling)? And so on.
If you take the time upfront to figure this out, when you’re talking with someone you’ll be able to more easily recognize these moments — and take advantage of them.
This may not necessarily be a simple question to answer. But when you do, it’ll serve you well in many different contexts.
Pay attention and actively look out for opportunities to “connect”, as you’ve defined above.
This seems obvious, but it can be a difficult step!
When we start talking with someone, we start with the best of intentions.
But then we get distracted.
We start thinking about other things, or spacing out, or rehearsing in our heads what we’ll say next, and so on.
If you’re doing this, you’re not really participating in the conversation you’re in. Not only that, you’re probably also missing big chunks of what the other person is saying — and along with it, missing opportunities to connect.
So practice staying present in the conversations you’re having.
And next time you want to connect with someone quickly, follow these 2 steps.
It’s amazing how much mileage you can get from such a simple process.
By the way, more on this topic is in module 3 of the Effortless Networking home-study program.
Till next week,
– Sri
