Effortless Networking

It’s Thanksgiving this week and I’m taking a break.

And you still have a few more days to cash in on my “Thanksgiving special”!

I’ll be back with a new article again next week.

Till then,
– Sri

If you’re reading this article, you probably read a fair amount in general. And at this point I think you probably know a lot about business networking and what you should and shouldn’t do.

So the question is, are you doing everything that you already know?

We often know exactly what we need to do — like eating healthily, exercising, and so on — and yet, we don’t do it.

Can you relate to it? Yes, me too!

Well, the same thing happens in our professional lives also.

This is the “knowing-doing gap”, as described by the authors of the book by the same title.

A lot of my work with private clients focuses on helping individuals close this gap.

So instead of giving you yet another tip on how to network better, how about I share with you a simple process to help you use what you already know?

Here it is:

1. Pick ONE thing that you’ve been meaning to do, but haven’t done yet — for whatever reason.

   Make a commitment to do it this week.

2. Then, as the week progresses, pay attention to whether or not you actually do it.

   Either way, you will get useful information to help you close the “knowing-doing” gap for this one particular thing.

   So don’t worry about “failing” — just go through this 3-step process.

3. At the end of the week, answer these questions for yourself, and see what you get:
   
   - Were you able to do what you intended to? If yes, what allowed you to follow through? If no, what prevented you from doing so?
   
   - What did you learn about this particular “knowing-doing” gap? And how will use this information?

The last step of looking back at what happened in specific detail, and generating ideas about how you might leverage this information, is critical — so don’t skip it!

Let me know how this works out for you — you can post a comment below or email me. Either way, I’d be curious to hear about how doing this exercise affected your networking efforts.

Also, more about how to close the “knowing-doing” gap in specific networking topics — such as relationship management, asking for what you want, etc. — is covered in the Effortless Networking home-study program.

Till next week,
– Sri

“How do I connect with someone quickly?”

This may seem like a simple question, but it’s actually a little more complex — and perhaps you know that already. When I work privately with clients on such a topic, it takes a few months!

Still, here are two steps you can take right away, to connect quickly with someone, no matter what the situation.

1. What are you listening for?

   In other words, how will you know when you’ve “connected” with someone?

   For instance, will you recognize the “connection” when you hear the other person say something in particular? Or when he or she has a certain facial expression? Or when you feel a particular way physically (i.e. gut feeling)? And so on.

   If you take the time upfront to figure this out, when you’re talking with someone you’ll be able to more easily recognize these moments — and take advantage of them.

   This may not necessarily be a simple question to answer. But when you do, it’ll serve you well in many different contexts.

2. Listen for it!

   Pay attention and actively look out for opportunities to “connect”, as you’ve defined above.

   This seems obvious, but it can be a difficult step!

   When we start talking with someone, we start with the best of intentions.

   But then we get distracted.

   We start thinking about other things, or spacing out, or rehearsing in our heads what we’ll say next, and so on.

   If you’re doing this, you’re not really participating in the conversation you’re in. Not only that, you’re probably also missing big chunks of what the other person is saying — and along with it, missing opportunities to connect.

   So practice staying present in the conversations you’re having.

And next time you want to connect with someone quickly, follow these 2 steps.

It’s amazing how much mileage you can get from such a simple process.

By the way, more on this topic is in module 3 of the Effortless Networking home-study program.

Till next week,
– Sri