How best to reciprocate?
Tuesday, December 27th, 2005Have you ever wondered what to offer in return, when someone in your network helps you out? Or how to differentiate yourself from others by giving back in a “better” way?
In this season of giving gifts, this seems like a good topic to review.
So let me start by asking you some questions.
Who are those people in your personal life to whom you enjoy “giving”? Why is this enjoyable for *you*? How do you know *what* to give them? And *when* do you give to these people, i.e. on special occasions only, when you get something from them, when you find something they’ll like or appreciate, when you know they need a boost, etc.?
Obviously, you don’t have this kind of relationship with every friend or family member. However, there are probably occasions when you do have to get gifts for friends and family members in your “outer circle”.
In these cases, how do you choose something that the recipient will truly appreciate? Do you ask the person directly? Do you ask a mutual friend or family member for ideas and suggestions? Something else? What makes you choose the way you do?
My point is this: networking is not a transaction. It’s a means to achieving what you want by leveraging your relationships with others.
If you approach networking as a transaction, always thinking about “what do I have to give in order to get X”, it can never be a fully satisfying nor rewarding experience.
On the other hand, if you consider your professional contacts like you do the people in your personal circle, how to reciprocate or what to offer becomes an easier question to answer.
Because then, how you reciprocate and what you offer each person is based on the kind of relationship you have with them — it depends on how well you know them, about what they want, like, find useful and appreciate.
And when it comes to expressing your heartfelt gratitude to someone when they help you out in some manner, you know how best to thank them, because you know them as a person and understand what would be meaningful and appropriate for them.
So, let’s take a look at your professional circle.
Who are your professional contacts to whom you enjoy giving? Are there people to whom you often forward information, just because you think it would be useful for their business? Or think of them right away whenever you meet a person who might be a good client for them? What allows you to do this? What makes it an enjoyable activity for you?
And if there’s no one in your list of professional contacts for whom you do this now, why do you suppose this is?
Pause for a moment and consider your answers to these questions.
What did you learn about how you give, whether personally or professionally? And more importantly, how can you use what you have learned to build professional relationships that are easy and fun for you? What do you need to know about your professional contacts, so that giving to them becomes both a natural and enjoyable activity for you?
Do you have enough to work with?
If you want additional resources, here are a couple:
- For specifics on how to cultivate strong, mutually beneficial professional relationships, check out module 3 of the Effortless Networking home-study program.
- For an in-depth assessment of your situation and personalized recommendations, click here).
I hope 2006 is a year of joyful giving (and receiving) for you. Happy New Year!
– Sri
