Effortless Networking

I got an email from a subscriber just the other day, saying that reading my regular articles, he realized that he instinctively knew how to network.

Well, of course — that’s absolutely true!

Networking is not anything magical or mysterious. “Networking” is something we all do everyday without thinking about it twice. And what I hope I do for you in each of my articles, CDs and workshops is draw your attention to this very fact.

My other goal is help you *refine* what you already do naturally, so you can focus your efforts and get better results.

So on that note, let’s talk about increasing your confidence level when it comes to networking.

Let me start by asking you this:

• Do you ever lose your confidence or feel insecure when you’re out networking?
• If so, do you know what *specifically* triggers these feelings?

Your answer to this question will help you avoid, eliminate or otherwise address the true obstacle — and therefore, clear the way for you to feel more confident in any situation, networking or otherwise.

For instance, early in my career, I had no confidence when it came to business networking.

I used to feel uncomfortable whenever I had to attend a networking meeting or event, because I assumed that I had to behave in a particular way. For instance, I assumed that I had to “work the room”, that I had to have an elevator speech and use it to introduce myself to everyone I met, and so on.

Just the thought of doing these things made me anxious — what if I forgot the words of my elevator speech, or stumbled over my words? What if I couldn’t wedge my way into a conversation with a group of people at a business mixer?

Only when I questioned these assumptions and checked the validity of them, was I able to get rid of my anxiety and nervousness, and become really confident about business networking.

One of the things I realized was that networking is not about making elevator speeches or working the room. Those are *techniques* one can use, but are not *required* for networking.

Networking is about finding and meeting people you want to meet, because of an interest that you have. For instance, you may be interested in finding a new job, or generating new leads or prospects, or finding resources or information for a new project. And you want to find people who can help you with these.

So I took a step back and considered how I might go about finding people who could help me with stuff like this, in a way that did not make me feel uncomfortable.

Once I did, it became my new way of networking.

I felt confident because it fit my personality. I felt comfortable approaching and networking with people (even strangers), AND I got the results I wanted!

Well, here’s what you can do to increase your confidence level:

1. Pay attention to those situations (networking related or not) when you feel confident. What specifically makes you feel this way?
2. Also pay attention to those situations (networking related or not) when you DON’T feel confident. What specifically makes you lose your confidence?
3. What’s the difference between the two types of situations? What are your assumptions in each case? Are they valid? How can you tell?

Your answers to these questions will reveal to you how you can overcome your inhibitions and increase your confidence.

By the way, step-by-step instructions on how to apply this concept is covered in “Overcome your Inhibitions about Networking” (module 2 in the Effortless Networking home-study program).

Till next time,
– Sri

Here is a question I recently received: How do I turn my contacts into advocates for my work in their organizations [so I get] more referrals?

A great question! I certainly struggled with this one when I first started my business, and I wish I had found the shortcut I’m about to give you sooner than I did.

Here’s what I learned: All contacts aren’t created equal.

Some people provide you with information, some support you and your business in ways other than providing you with referrals, and some provide you with leads and referrals. Of course, some people do all three — but these are rare.

The most common mistake people make is treating and interacting with all their contacts as if they were all sources of referrals.

This can be a very frustrating experience for you and the other person. And it’s ineffective because it doesn’t get you the results that you want.

For instance, during my first year in business, I regularly asked former colleagues in the corporate sector for referrals. However, most of them didn’t have direct access to my target market, who were typically self-employed professionals or small business owners.

So even though they wanted to help, they often couldn’t.

I realized later that they would have been great referral sources if I had been looking for leads in the corporate sector.

Once I identified better sources of referrals for my new line of business, I got better results. And my interactions with my former colleagues improved as well (I didn’t feel frustrated by their “lack of support” and I’m sure they were relieved to be let off the hook for something they couldn’t do anyway!).

My point is this: first identify who can be a good referral source for you. Then focus your efforts on converting *those* contacts into advocates for you and your work.

Here’s a book that can help you identify people who can be good sources of referrals for you: “Business by Referral”.

I liked this book because it’s easy to read and provides a wide range of strategies and tactics to help you build and use your network. And if you like tools and templates to help you systematize your networking, this book has an appendix full of them.

What the book doesn’t provide, is how to build and sustain these relationships in a natural way. I found some parts of their approach too stilted and “rehearsed”. It didn’t fit my preferred way of interacting with people.

So here’s another resource to complement the book: “Cultivate strong, mutually-beneficial professional relationships“.

The most important part of this program actually is the step-by-step implementation plan. This is where you get 95% of the learning and this is what helps you apply, adapt and integrate the concepts I mention here into your daily life.

I hope you find these resources useful.

Till next time,
– Sri

I got many questions recently asking about how to generate business or make money through networking. And I continue to get questions about how to start, or politely end networking conversations.

Instead of simply answering these questions, I’ve decided to do something new and different; something that I hope will be even more useful for you!

I want to provide you with opportunities to actually apply and practice the concept I offer.

It’s one thing to read about how to network better; it’s a completely different thing to *experience* what works for you and what doesn’t. This first-hand experience is what allows you to adapt and refine the networking theories and concepts to fit your particular situation.

So, I’m having a “networking contest”.

This contest creates opportunities for you to practice the following (if you so choose):

• initiate conversations with people you meet for the first time
• politely and professionally end these conversations and move on
• follow up with people in a meaningful and relevant manner
• re-connect with people you already know, but haven’t been in touch with for a while
• make referrals

If promoting yourself or your business is uncomfortable for you, start by practicing promoting someone else’s product or service that you use and love.

So if you find “Effortless Networking” a useful resource, use it as the topic to initiate your conversations with people you don’t know, or reconnect with people you do, offer it as a resource to those who may benefit from it, and so on.

Notice whether talking about someone else’s product or service is easier for you, and if so, why is this? Then start figuring out how to transfer these components when talking about your own business.

You can browse through articles on this website or any networking books that you might have to get information and ideas on how to do all of the above. Or try out *your* personal approach to all this.

Of course, you can simply enter the contest to win the prize and not use it to practice any of these.

The prize is a great book that addresses the question of how to generate new business through networking. The name of the book is “Business by Referral: A Sure-Fire Way To Generate New Business” by Ivan R. Misner and Robert Davis.

I like this book because it presents information in bite-sized chunks and is easy to read. It offers a wide range of strategies and tactics that you can choose from, to network creatively. And it has an appendix full of tools and templates, if you want to systematize your networking efforts. A great reference book overall.

To participate, or for more information about this contest, click here.

And here’s the best part: I’ll run this contest every month for the next 6 months, so you have plenty of opportunities to practice (and win).

Good luck!
– Sri

Generating qualified leads on a regular basis is something that most business people want. And I’ve received several questions recently about this.

Let me start by saying that there’s more than one way to generate leads.

And networking is only one of those ways.

To generate good quality leads through networking, you must do three things:

1. *Ask* for referrals
2. Ask the *right people* for your referrals
3. Ask clearly and in a way that people understand *exactly* what you’re looking for.

By the way, how to ask for something in a way that gets you the results you want, is something I cover in great detail in my “3 Secrets for Effortless Networking” program.

Another way to generate leads is through prospecting.

You’ve probably heard me make this distinction many times already — but oh, what the heck, I’ll repeat myself!

Networking is not the same as prospecting.

One is not necessarily better than the other. They’re just two different things and appropriate for different contexts.

So if you want to generate leads through prospecting, here is an excellent book for you: “The Accidental Salesperson” by Chris Lytle.

I rate it “excellent” because it is packed with information yet easy to read. And it’s funny!

I stumbled upon this book accidentally (yes, really!) when I first started my business.

I used to dislike “selling” because it made me uncomfortable, but I recognized that as a business owner I had to do it. And as with networking, I wanted to find a way to sell that was natural and comfortable for both me and my prospects.

So I was delighted with my accidental find!

This book provides a step-by-step guide on generating leads and converting them into customers. The author uses anecdotes and refers to movies that really bring to life the concepts he presents (I found this very helpful). He also provides tools and templates to give the reader a jumpstart on applying the concepts in the book.

For me, just reading the book increased my comfort level with the concept of “selling”.

And although I didn’t use everything the book suggests (usually because it didn’t fit the nature of my business), what I did use has been very helpful.

So I hope this book proves useful to you too.

All the best,
– Sri