Effortless Networking

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I recently presented to a business women’s networking group.

I was rather taken aback by a comment made by a seasoned and experienced networker.

She suggested to the audience (in the middle of my presentation, no less) that networking was hard. So people should practice finding and talking with one prospect at every event they attended.

Now, you probably know by now how I go on about the fact that “networking” is not the same as “prospecting”.

And I started my presentation by explaining the difference between the two.

What I realized when this experienced networker made this comment, is just how deeply ingrained this confusion is.

I’m curious about your comments on this.

What do you think “networking” is?

And what would you do — if anything — to clarify this to someone who may be confused?

Has “networking” become tedious for you? Has “keeping it up” become a tiresome chore?

If so, you may be confusing “networking” with “keeping in touch”.

“Networking” and “keeping in touch” are not the same thing.

You keep in touch with people for a variety of reasons. And networking may be one such reason.

For instance, I keep in touch with some co-workers from a past jobs simply because I like them.

I enjoyed working with them, and have good memories. So I like to look them up when I’m in town, just to say hello and see how they’re doing. Or send them a card for New Year.

And sometimes, I may turn to one of these people for help.

Sometimes, I may ask for help with a networking objective — such as, how best to approach the decision-maker within his or her current organization.

I suppose you can think of “networking” as getting in touch with someone for a specific reason, which usually involves asking for something — such as, asking for advice, asking for a recommendation, making a business proposition and asking for participation, and so on.

So, if your only reason to keep in touch with someone is for “networking” purposes, it can get tedious.

After all, if you have nothing else to talk about (besides asking for something) when you get together to “network” week after week, month after month, it can become awkward, mechanistic, and uninspiring.

This is why “networking” often fails.

To avoid this problem and confusion,

• First clarify why you want to meet and make sure that both sides see the benefit of getting together — or staying in touch. This is one simple way you can identify the “right” people to stay in touch with.
• Then together you can decide how best to keep in touch (e.g. by phone, email, in-person, or a combination), how often to connect with each other, what to talk about when you do connect, and so on.

This allows you to stay in regular contact — with the right people at the right frequency — without it becoming a burden.

Here’s a comment I got recently:

“I took a full time job and am not involved with networking anymore.”

I was so struck by this comment, that I couldn’t stop thinking about it!

Here’s what I was wondering about:

1. What does this person understands “networking” to be?
2. Why does having a full time job make “networking” unimportant or unnecessary for this person?

I’d love to hear your comments about this.

In the meantime, here are my thoughts on the topic.

For most people, the activity known as “business networking” is really an opportunity to go out “prospecting”. In other words, these people attend business mixers and other networking events to look for prospects (people to whom they can sell).

That’s prospecting. Prospecting is very useful — it’s just that it’s not the same as networking.

For other people, “business networking” is a way to meet people who can help them find prospects. In other words, the focus is on building a “leads/referral engine” to get new prospects.

That would explain the attitude “no longer doing direct sales, so no longer interested in networking”.

So is this the only use for business networking?

Not for me!

• I have used business networking to find jobs in the past.
• Networking has helped me discover publicity opportunities for my business. (I used these to generate well qualified leads.)
• I have made good friends through this process as well. (Many of these people later recommended me to others, told me about opportunities, and given me valuable advice.)

And this is just a short list…

My impression is that most people limit themselves to just getting leads and referrals, when it comes to business networking.

I wonder why that is?